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Just Because I’m Kind Doesn’t Mean I’m a Pushover

In a Facebook/Youtube/Instagram live I did last month (you can watch it here) I chose to speak about how my kindness can sometimes be mistaken for weakness. Of course, my kindness is a strength, though I know that some people who are strong in voicing their opinions might see my gentle approach as being a weak approach. The issue stems from the fact that historically, I have not wanted to engage in arguments; I really don’t like confrontation! So what can we do when we don’t want to fight with someone but we want our thoughts to be taken seriously? We can choose to stand up for ourselves by being kind and clear.

I’ve been asking my people on the ‘other side’ to help me with this over the course of the last year. Even though my NDE taught me how to live with self-love, there were still times when I would intentionally walk away from a confrontation; I would give in thinking that it wasn’t nice of me to argue. This was an old habit that was going to take some time to change! So, over the course of the last year, I realized I could be heard more if I didn’t ignore or sidestep the louder voices out there if I could find ways to express my opinion AND be kind at the same time. I have felt supported by my deceased loved ones in this respect — and it has been working! I feel my spirit people helping me with this by standing firmly with me when I say things like “I don’t feel that is right for me”, or “I didn’t like the way that conversation went, can we start over?”, or “I don’t hold the same belief as you, but that’s ok — I can have mine and you can have yours.”

There are many ways for me to be kind in the words I choose and the tone I use, and yet express my thoughts clearly and firmly. What I find when I do this is that I get a bit more respect out of the transaction, and energetically this charges me positively. I don’t have to sacrifice my kindness to be heard; my kindness and my confidence to express my thoughts clearly and calmly are resulting in many more positive outcomes!

Much love,


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